Monday, January 11, 2010

How To Be A Lions Fan

Being a Detroit Lion’s fan, I have long since realized that I will never be able to derive any enjoyment from actually rooting for them, as they will forever be stuck somewhere amidst their grand 78 year rebuilding plan.

So, when your team is horrible, the only real fun you can have is rooting against other teams. For me, this comes down to mainly the Viking and the Packers, since they play in the same division and have winning streaks against the Lions that probably date back to the eighties.

As you may guess, I was enjoyed the Packers losing to the Cardinals yesterday, although I will say I was impressed with the comeback the Packer mounted. It was also fun to be at work today, as the first two hours or so were devoted to angry Packers fans complaining about just about everything. This was in stark contrast to the silence and gloom that hung over the workplace after the playoff game against Philadelphia a few years ago where Freddie Mitchell, who is also known for wearing bow ties and thanking his hands for being so great, caught a pass on 4th and 26 to help send the game into overtime, which the Eagles eventually won after Brett Favre was intercepted on a moon ball that looked more like a punt than a pass.

So, I’m feeling pretty happy.

This leaves next week when the Vikings play the Cowboys. Actually, the Cowboys have always been quite irritating, so it will be hard to root for them. Still, I would like to see the Vikings lose. This is mainly because they are incredibly annoying. For example, I was in Minnesota a few weeks ago and I heard a radio advertisement for the Vikings where the announcer said in his Serious Announcer Tone: “Your home of the first place Vikings! Next stop: Miami!” Apparently the Super Bowl is in the bag. I would have liked to bonk my head on something, but I was driving at the time so I had to settle on gritting my teeth. I mean, have you counted any un-hatched chickens lately? Sheesh.

Of course I realize that I am a hateful person to get my jollies on rooting against others. But I do have the perfect excuse: I’m a Lions fan. It’s lucky I’m not even more mentally deranged. So there.

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