Blogiversary Q&A

Q. Um, is this thing on?
A. I think so.

Q. So, are you ready?
A. As ready as I’ll ever be.

Q. All right. For starters, is your three year blogiversary post really going to be one of those cheesy fictitious question and answer interview sessions?
A. Absolutely. Don’t judge me.

Q. Does it mean that since you’ve sunk to this new low you’re out of interesting things to write about, and consequently your blog is about to jump the proverbial shark?
A. I’m actually pretty sure that ship sailed a long time ago.

Q. Hmm. I tend to agree with that.
A. That’s not even a question.

Q. Oh, right. Um, did you know that I tend to agree with your assessment?
A. Oh, that’s clever. Real professional.

Q. Listen buddy, I don’t have to take this from anybody! I can walk out at any time! What, do you wanna interview yourself, or what?
A. I actually kind of think I am.

Q. Oh, yeah. This whole thing is kind of weird, isn’t it?
A. Yup.

Q. Well, shall we try it again?
A. Sure.

Q. So, three years, huh?
A. That’s barely a question.

Q. But was it technically a question?
A. I suppose, technically...

Q. Then do you think that perhaps you should be more focused on answering what has just been established to be a question instead of berating the interviewer?
A. Yes, I suppose I probably should. Sorry. I don’t do many interviews. Hmm, three years…Three whole years…So many posts, so little useful information.

Q. Perhaps you'd like to take us behind the scenes of the creation of a typical blog posting, from inspiration to finished product, so we can all get an in-depth understanding of what it’s like to work behind Curly’s desk?
A. Um, no.

Q. Are you sure?
A. Yes.

Q. All right then. Do you think that you could have spent the last three years doing something more productive than maintaining this blog?
A. Most likely.

Q. Do you regret not doing so?
A. Heck no. This is the easiest job in the world. And also the lowest paying.

Q. Ha! That’s classic Curly humor, right there.
A. Sorry to be a wet blanket, but again, that’s not a question.

Q. Party pooper. How about this then, maybe I use an ‘O’ next time, instead of a ‘Q’? You know, for ‘Observation’?
A. So it would be an observation and response session, instead of a question and answer session?

Q. Actually, that’s a question on your point, not an answer, and you used an ‘A’ for it. I think you should have used a 'Q'.
A. I’m getting confused.

Q. Me too. But yes, maybe it’d be more of an observation and response session - oh wait, I’ve already marked this as a question. Um, what do you say about that?
A. Nice save. But whatever you’d like to do. You’re the interviewer here.

O. Sweet.
R. Hey! Using an ‘O’ actually kind of works. I like it. And I used an 'R'!

O. Sweet.
R. Sweet indeed.

Q. Back to the questions. How weird is it to be arguing with yourself in this post?
A. Not as weird as one may think.

Q. But it’s still somewhat weird, right?
A. A little.

Q. With that in mind, do you think that anybody is actually still reading this, or have they all given up, wondering just what in the heck is going on?
A. They’ve probably all given up. We’ve definitely gotten off track.

Q. True. Let’s move on to the next question. Is there anybody you’d like to thank, or perhaps give a “shout-out” to?
A. Nah, I’m good.

Q. Don’t you think that your readers deserve some sort of acknowledgement for taking time out of their busy days to read your inane posting?
A. I thought we already established that nobody is still reading this, which would make that pretty much a moot point.

Q. But what if somebody didn’t get disgusted with this monstrosity of a blog post and is still reading? What if they’re scrolling through right now? There’s nothing you’d want to say to them, on this, your blogiversary?
A. That was actually three questions. Next time use three Q’s, like ‘QQQ’. But as for my readers, I thanked them last year, and nothing’s changed since then. They know where we stand.

O. That sounds like a veiled ‘thank you’ to me.
R. Think of it however you want to, Mr. Look-Into-Everything-Way-Too-Deeply.

O. Jerk.
R. Loser.

Q. Next question. Do you plan to continue this blog?
A. Yes. With Click and Clack retiring, I don’t think the American public could take another blow like that to their collective psyche.

O. Some classic Curly sarcasm there, folks!
R. {shrugs shoulders}

QQ. Do you still enjoy blogging? Or has it turned into a chore?
A. Hey, you got the multiple ‘Q’ thing right! And, yes I still enjoy it.

Q. Are you ever going to bring back your initial banner, you know, the one that actually had a picture of your desk?
A. I kind of wish I could, but I don’t have that picture anymore. Somehow I deleted it from my computer. I wonder if anybody else has it? That would be weird, but…

Q. Why did you change the banner anyway? I liked the old one.
A. I got a new desk, and I thought I should update the banner accordingly with a new picture. However, as it turns out, I’ve only got one good desk picture in me, and I used it up on my first banner. All subsequent attempts with the new desk failed miserably, and by the time I figured it out, I’d already lost the original picture.

O. Sad.
R. Yes. That was the best part of the entire blog, that’s for sure.

QQ. Any hints as to what’s coming in year four? Something to wet our proverbial whistles?
A. I dunno. More of the same junk designed to get peoples’ minds off of the real world, if only for a little while?

O. Okay. Fair enough.
R. {Does not respond}

Q. Well, I’m kind of getting bored with this whole thing. How about you?
AQ. I was bored by about the second question. Should we wrap it up?

O. Ha! An Answer/Question!
R. {beams proudly}

Q. Well, how about one last question?
A. Shoot.

Q. Could you post, one final time, the picture of a giant slug, even though there have been no documented cases of anybody actually finding it funny?
A. Absolutely.